Life's Puzzle...

I have made strides where I never thought my heart or mind would ever take...doors opened I never thought there were keys for and been blessed with phenomenal children, family and friends who encourage each step and listen to each cry and feel the warmth of each smile... So many blessings that it makes this time of the year a time to reflect and remember how far we have all come and yet there is so much still to create and seek...Life as amazing as it is.... it is still a puzzle that is completed one piece at a time... I have realized why I ALWAYS put the outside edges of the puzzle together first...they are simple, they make sense and are easy to find..they have a defined shape and lines and make the foundation easy...the inside pieces are all different colors and shapes and have to be turned around put together and taken apart to find the exact combination to fit together... Puzzles are one of those things I like to work on then for awhile, then walk away and come back when I have patience and time...sometimes Life doesn't give us that time and I have to remember my patience and take a deep breath...but keep working on each part and the end result can be a amazement of many little pieces that create a picture or scene... And then after lunch today a friend said..."You are such a beautiful puzzle..so many amazing parts and pieces...you offer so much and give to so many...I cant wait to see what happens as you keep putting the pieces together... So here I go....

Sharing...

Sometimes sharing is as simple as "all the toys are for all the kids"...sometimes it is breaking that cookie in two parts...

Sometimes it is talking about some of the important or intimate parts of your life...And sometimes THAT sharing is the toughest! Why does opening up feel so raw at times..

Trusting someone with you past or struggles, joys and accomplishments can be a very close feeling..and it is Ok! For most know I have walls that have protected me for 4.5 years..not negative walls but ones that helped me survive. But I am feeling ok with trusting and letting go and stepping away from the santuary of keeping everyone at a distance..for those who have had patience and continued to wait...thank you for believing in the "day" when I would remember it was ok and wonderful to be alive...

Things still take time...such as tonight I am still at work and thought WHY arent you headed home...I miss being soo excited to walk thru the doors...for that hug and kiss, for the time of making dinner, listening to the kids while sharing a meal, washing dishes and cleaning up, watching tv and telling the kids goodnight and just the peacefulness of family time. Sometimes we forget to step back and look at even a hectic day as being a blessed day...remember to listen to the kids, kiss and hug and make everyone so glad to be home..we should all look forward to driving home (there was a time long ago I dreaded it with fear and anxiety)..Someday coming home will be easier...for now one step at a time!