Friday Friday...

I found myself dancing in the car on my drive into work..and smiling..feeling alive...without it being scary..without thinking I HATE FRIDAYS..but feeling ok..living.

I am still dragging with this cold/bug and coughing has made for sore ribs!

It truley is one day at a time...step by step....

It is Friday and I am ok :o)

A plate of Fresh Veggies

Ordinarily I would have taken a picture...but imagine the colors of carrots, snow peas and broccoli...bright and bold and so delish! That was lunch..along with a Boca burger (I heart them!) I have very little appetite but felt I need to feed the body to fight the cold..so why not be healthy and yummy! I am determined to walk at least 30 min tonight..just to feel energy and not just wish for it..this cold is really hanging on and I am getting FRUSTRATED!

Easter consisted of Chinese Food, a stop at the pharmacy for more Nyquil and back to bed! Nick was a trooper and was so understanding and decided no chocolate bunny needed..he would make brownies! So he did!

I just am so ready to feel better so I can get on with working out and feeling the "spring" back in my step..not the stuffy nose and froggy voice!

Easter what??? ohh Bunny and Eggs

Somehow as the years have past I no longer can remember where the plastic bright colored eggs are or if I have any spare easter grass..and where oh where are those ginormous easter baskets that once made the kiddos eyes HUGE with delight with the thought that the Easter Bunny would magically fill them with sweets and chocolates along with a game, toy, book or other treasures...

Now with the last one 17 almost 18 he askes.."Can we go to the mall and just get something cool? I really dont like chocolate bunnies but a Cinnabon Roll would be delish!"
Hmm so long gone are the days of dye stained hands and funky looking deviled eggs from the hence dyed eggs that were discovered in the morning during the egg hunt and turned into yummy appetizers of deviled eggs!
Easter dinner that used to seat 12 or more family members will now be a few close friends with teens huddled around the tv watching a movie while we chat.
No early morning wake ups... no hiding eggs in the pouring rain and freezing kids hurrying inside to check their eggs and devour the goodies...Ahhh the Easter Bunny has found a new home...but (whispering) I never liked to dye eggs or gut a pumpkin :o)

New Tastes and Adventures

Ok after years of shuddering at even the thought of Sushi...I ventured out to try it this past summer..and ate and ate and ate sushi! Ohhh dear I love sushi! We tried 5-6 places around town and found so many different types!

Again a new adventure..a new flavor...a new change..it wasnt so scary..but delish!

Bobblehead

There is only one way to describe how I felt when I woke up today..bobblehead! My head felt 5xs as big as my body..I hate colds..ughhhh

I again went into work late after a Theraflu treatment a few extra hours of ZZZZZ and a hot shower...I still feel like a bobblehead but more awake!

I was reading my favorite foodie blog and realized..I havent menu planned in sooo long...wait 3 years at least. Life seemed to stop 3 years ago...

So I picked up my pen and paper and began mapping out my shopping list and 10 days of meals...one more thing started again..just different as it is meals for 2 or 3...but another step!

Yea Spring!

Hmmm insightful people surround me!

"A change..I can sense a change about you..opening the door...stepping into the sunlight...You go girl...step out.."

Thanks Chelle

"It is good to see you smile..really smile.."

My Boss

"You are ready...Go slow...I love you"

I love you too Mom

You will be ok...you are strong and beautiful...like a butterfly..be what you are meant to be..fly

Stephanie- nieniedialouges.com

Thank you Stephanie..thanks for showing us all beauty

So with some of the strongest support I have and some of the most wonderful people I know..I have announced...me...I am ready

Yuck

I have a sore throat...I woke up feeling like a Mac truck had hit me..low grade fever, sore throat and pounding headache...but alas I drug myself out of bed at 7 am...I HAD to get the roast in before collapsing back into my blankets

Drank some water..took Tylenol
Made Theraflu in a mug
peeled potatoes
started the CrockPot (that my son lovingly bought with his own money for me at Christmas!)
Put the roast in..added carrots and sliced potatoes
Spices ands garlic
Add a little broth...

Oh and take the above pictured pup out to potty, fed and watered..

Back to bed..
WAIT..
call boss..reminded of teleconference at the office at 1..will I make it in??

YUCK

Up at 10:30am..better..not great..showered..more coffee..at the office

Did anyone get the license plate of that truck that hit me?

Sight..with no eyes

I am watching Extreme Makeover...wow a 19 yr old with so much insight. Yet this is something I try to teach my kids on a daily basis...The boy said..I am blind with no eyes yet see better than most. I do not judge on color, looks or the outside like most sighted people. I see the inside which is who the person really is..

This year on Nicks wrestling team there were a few kids with physical and mental disabilities..he was always supportive and yet as protetive as he was of the kids he also treated them as any other wrestler.. I always said..walk in their shoes..be them for a day..

Ok this show can really get me thinking!

Off to workout...besides cleaning the kitchen!

This is inspiration..this is courage...this is my support in looking deep inside finding the real you and what is truly important and good..what you have to offer and to give to others and what family and true courage is....Steph has been thru so much and is still one of the most beautiful people I know. Her pain, her strength and her undying love for her family is amazing. I feel blessed beyond words

Last night we had group dinner at my house..single parents and all the kids sharing whatever is in the fridge! A great group of neighbors and always interesting conversation! John and Chelle both said.."when you are ready to date you will have them lined up around the block" (HA thinking a few more months at the gym..maybe.) The ideal that what is inside a person is so powerful..intelligence, emotion, mental strength and well-being and spirituality can make a person remind me of Steph..in so many ways..one day at a time...John says.."I could talk to you for hours..you listen, truly listen and care..you have had what so many of us look for." That what friends are for I said in response!

I miss Bill dearly but he taught me so much and gave to me in so many ways. I am strong & I have been loved with all of his heart and soul. I know what I want I know I am a good person and friend, I dont dwell on what could be but instead what will be and how to get there, I know I am a fantastic Mom and work hard to always let my kids know their importance in my life and remind them to be true to themselves and love who they are.

When talking last night they said.."But you know that absolute love, the true heart and soul and being in love with your best friend"....I do and it truly was a gift. I know what a healthy relationship is and how to have one. I have strong morals and values and a deep spiritual strength. God is good and has gotten me thru so much... I do not preach my beliefs rather I live them, I do not force them on others but hope to be a support and mentor. We all have "issues" and "baggage" as Chelle stated.. I like to look at it as having a past and life experiences. You grow when you learn from them and do not re-do the mistakes but rather change for the better so not to repeat.

So now on to the gym tonight and to finish my cottage cheese and broccoli!

Being adorable..with brains!!

Last night we went out dancing..I dont drink but I love to dance! Being with my friends in a small salon dancing and knowing 1/2 the people that walk in the door is fun, no drinks needed except for ice water with a straw.. please!
SO we danced and danced..3 hours worth! (legs are feeling it today with topping it off with a 2 mile walk before dancing and then a workout on Sunday!)
This weekend one of our friends brought along a buddy (male) and he was amazed at how short I am and how amazing I was! LOL not sure how to take that but he was a nice guy, he was there to meet people and boy did he LOL. The comment.."Your eyes smile and you love to laugh"..made me feel alive..just to be able to show signs that I feel alive...
I struggle with the physical apperance of losing weight and not feeling thin..but that is all in time..and it is all a physical exsistence..because what doesnt change is I love to smile, laugh, be with friends, dance, wear cute clothes, get a pedicure and feel cute...adorable...lol the last comment was "freakin cute"!
I have brains, strong common sense, intelligence, passion and secure in who I am and what I have accomplished...and am continuing to accomplish...I dont need fixing...I need to live and enjoy life..thru the highs and lows..